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Trying to unlock my aqua so I can use any network sim card and been told I need to flash the phone as there is (0) next to sim lock settings I have the unlock code from network provider just need to know how to do it
Flashing won't help. You need to contact your Local support in order to reset the counter. See this thread:
/t5/Xperia-E3/sony-xperia-e3-zero-attempts-hard-lock/m-p/1086375#M1981
Perhaps you asked or they understood something else. you have to tell them that you want the SIM lock code so you can use it with a different code.
They probably thought that you were locked out of your phone and needed a code to unlock it, which they suggested to reset the phone.
The code can only be acquired either by your carrier/network or online, perhaps if you borrow a SIM card from a different carrier.